America finds love at Wal-Mart
Low prices, high romance? A study of Craigslist missed connections finds the superstore is a romantic hotspot in 15 states.
For a lucky 15 states in this lovelorn union of ours, the best hope for bringing a little romance into their citizens' lives lies just beyond the customer service counter of the local Wal-Mart (WMT). CNNMoney notes that, according to a study of "missed connections" posts on Craigslist conducted by Psychology Today magazine, Wal-Mart was the most popular place to find love in the U.S. overall.
It's not that there's any romance to rolled-back prices or an aphrodisiac effect to the last-minute splurge items situated in front of the registers. It's just that, in certain states, Wal-Mart is the population's best chance at a universal, communal experience.
In Massachusetts, New York, New Jersey, Illinois and Washington, D.C., that experience is a commuter rail or subway ride. In California, it's the post-work stop at 24-Hour Fitness. In Wisconsin, it's any bar where the taps are flowing. In Hawaii, it's the beach. In Nevada, the casinos.
While Boston Magazine sees fit to opine about the study's statement of love on the rails, a big swath of the country snaking its way from from North Carolina to Idaho could fill a book of sonnets with their experiences between the resin patio chairs and the racks of Angry Birds T-shirts. While “missed connections” almost invariably consists of missed opportunities and sad endings, the fact that folks are looking even under some of the least ideal conditions should give the lonely cause for optimism.
After all, if Mr. or Ms. Right shares your affinity for wide aisles, hangar lighting and low-priced, low-durability goods, then that's a good base, right? Maybe they'll agree to meet with you over a cup of coffee at the in-store Dunkin' Donuts. Maybe that will lead to dinner at the in-store McDonald's or Subway. From there, it's just a quick jaunt to the jewelry section for an engagement ring and to the front desk to start a wedding registry.
It's a frightening first step toward a future that may only end when you and your beloved are sent to rest in matching Wal-Mart caskets, but it's still a better bet for young romantics that what lies ahead if they wait. Among Craigslist posters 40 and over, Psychology Today says the most missed connections came from encounters at strip clubs and adult bookstores. Say what you will about the folks pricing out snow tires in automotive, but at least they're not going to introduce themselves by shoving a wadded-up $1 into your waistband.
I met my last three wives in Walmart.
#1 - The fat one, I met in the potato chip isle.
#2 - The smelly one, I met in the pet food isle.
#3 - The lazy one, I met near the TV's.
I am now shopping at Target...
Oh wow, I know just how they feel.
I get screwed everytiime I walk into Wal-Mart.
It also helps if you speak spanish.
My husband and I met at walmart nearly 10 yrs ago!! Still going strong!
I never got lucky at Wal-Mart.
But the employees are working and paying taxes instead of sitting around collecting welfare and foodstamps. So I wish them all the love they can get. The customers might as well enjoy each other too. Shopping should be fun!
WalMart is like Las Vegas. We know what the outcome is going to be.....but we love to go anyway.
Welcome to the Wal-Mart Love Toilet. Would you like an apple pie with that?
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