Sneaky restaurant tricks
Even when you think you're dining out cheap, restaurants have ways to get you to pay more. Watch our 'Undercover Secrets' video and learn the tricks of the trade.
Who doesn't love dining out from time to time? It's a little luxury that doesn't even have to be too fancy. But watch out: Even "budget" dining establishments have tried-and-true tricks to get you to part with more of your hard-earned cash.
From salty snacks at the bar (they make you thirsty) to smaller plates and wider cups (portions looks smaller so you order more), restaurants keep their eye on their bottom line, not yours. Understand some of the standard tricks and you'll save a bundle every time you go out.
Watch and learn with "Undercover Secrets," a new weekly series on MSN Money.
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Usually I masturbate while I'm eating, so eating out isn't an option. Occasionally if I see a restaurant I like with very few cars in the parking lot, I'll go in and request a booth in the back so I can pleasure myself during a good meal.
It was kind of funny. I was at a Red Lobster one time and was really stroking it hard while munching on a lobster biscuit. I ended up shooting a big load of semen all over the table right when the waiter came to refill my drink. He didn't seem to mind much and casually wiped it up.
But, anyways, I agree a lot more restuarants are using little tricks to get us to spend more. You can always tell right away if they start plugging some special or appetizers that they just want a bunch of your money. I'm usually fluffing myself when they first come to the table, so it's kind of annoying. If a server keeps pestering me, I'll blow my load all over the seats as retaliation.
Well, I'm going to go make a sandwich and toss one off on my back porch. Happy eating!
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